Thursday, August 25, 2016

Music and Lyrics

"My favorite thing is to hear how the songs start showing up in people's lives, and help them talk to God in their everyday situations". - Matt Redman (Christian singer/songwriter)

From a very young age music has been a central part of my life.  It gives voice to my feelings, emotions, and thoughts when I can't quite find the words to express them myself.  It is also a mode through which the Lord speaks His truth and promises into my life.  And, oh how I love that He sets those truths and promises to music.  As I sing them over and over I am able to memorize the wisdom and encouragement they hold, and am reminded He is ever present and ever faithful.  Just think of all the wonderful God given lyrics that speak so dearly to our hearts...

 "On Christ the solid rock I stand all other ground is sinking sand"
"In Christ alone my hope is found, He is my light, my strength, my song"

Most recently I've been loving the song, "In the Eye of Storm" by Ryan Stevenson.  It's good, good stuff, people.  You should totally check it out. 

"In the eye of the storm, You remain in control
In the middle of the war, You guard my soul
You alone are the anchor, when my sails are torn
Your love surrounds me, in the eye of the storm"

As the Lord speaks to me through song, I am reminded of this passage of scripture in the book of Zephaniah:

"For the Lord your God is living among you. He is a mighty savior. He will take delight in you with gladness. With His love, He will calm all your fears. He will rejoice over you with joyful songs." – Zephaniah 3:17 (NLT)
I"ve been filling up on His joyful songs lately (and chocolate...lots and lots of chocolate).  You know the old saying, "Garbage in, garbage out"?  My mind is prone to wander and worry, and if allowed to roam free I would quickly find myself wrecked with fear and anxiety.  God breathed, joyful songs of love are just what my weary heart, mind and soul needs! 

This past Sunday marked twelve weeks of walking this present road my family and me are on...this detour we did not anticipate we'd be taking.  Twelve mentally, emotionally, and physically exhausting long weeks of walking, trusting, singing, and waiting for answers yet to come.   I'm still experiencing symptoms of a potential cancer recurrence. There's been no change in my diagnosis either.  Just waiting, waiting, and more waiting. 

I feel I can see a "Y" just ahead in the road, but when we"ll reach it is anyone"s guess.  One path takes us down the road of cancer again.  The other allows us to continue life where we left off twelve weeks back.   I struggle with wanting to run ahead to get to the "Y" faster, and slowing my pace dreading what may come. It"s been hard to juggle the thoughts and feelings we've had along this road, and I'd be lying if I told you it's been easy to keep the faith.   This limbo of desperately wanting answers yet being scared of hearing them rips at my heart.  Somedays it's all I can do to keep the tears at bay, to whisper prayers and scripture over the fears that haunt my mind, and to wait patiently on the Lord.   

One of my favorite scriptures is:

"But they that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint." – Isaiah 40:31 (KJV)

A few years ago, I wrote a song around this verse.  It's titled apropos, "They That Wait". A friend of mine recorded and produced the song for me.  He also played all the instruments on the song. In retrospect maybe I should have had him sing it as well... :) If you can stomach my vocal, you can listen to the song here:

This song, and many others have been such a source of encouragement to me lately.  I've got a playlist, and I'm not afraid to use it!!  The lyrics in the second verse of my song are as follows:

When the days get long and I feel so weak
I'll keep pressing on cause You are my strength
I will rest in Your divine delays
And choose to follow You all my days
(They That Wait, © Angela Winterbower 2011)

God breathed, joyful songs of love for the wait.  I'm doing my best to press on, rest in the divine delays, and follow God’s will.  Some days are easier than others...this waiting is hard.  And, it takes a whole lot of focus to stay...focused. 

Next week and the following week, I will return to the doctor for more scans.   We would truly appreciate your continued prayers.  And, if you have some songs you think I should add to my playlist, or perhaps some encouraging words or scripture to share, well, feel free to pass the suggestions along!  I'll just be here waiting. 

Thanks guys!  Much love.